Becoming a Can-Do Mom, Raising Can-Do Kids
In my devotion today on Crosswalk and Proverbs 31 Ministries, I talked about a situation where I felt frustrated and completely helpless as a mom. So I asked for God's help and He came through with a powerful promise to help my son become a can-do kid, and help me become a can-do mom!

Andrew moved beyond who he was to who he could become with God's help. He learned (and is still learning) that he can do all things through Christ who gives him strength, (Phil. 4:13). It’s a spiritual lesson that's become part of his spiritual legacy. A lesson that's lasted for years. He was four when it happened and he just turned eleven yesterday!

Monday we talked here about our calling to teach God's truths to our kids in everyday moments. All throughout January, I'll be sharing on my blog about becoming a D6 family based on God's instructions in Deuteronomy 6:5-9. I'll also be partnering with the D6 conference/ministry each weekday to give away resources to encourage you and your kids along the way.

My story in today's devotion a D6 moment when I saw what it meant to live out the principles in Deuteronomy 6 - to pass on God's promises as we go along. God showed me real life application of His Word in the middle of a motherhood meltdown.

And the lesson lingered. It's been applicable in the days that followed. A year or so afterwards, we were getting ready to leave for school and Joshua offered to help Andrew feed the dogs. Andrew smiled and said, “No thanks. I don’t need help. I’m a can-do kid!”

Just yesterday Andrew was struggling with anxiety. I shared how I have worries, too, and described how I write them down and give them to God. We talked about living in today and not tomorrow until it gets here. Then I read him the devotion and reminded him that he's a can-do kid who can trust God with His concerns. Then we prayed Philippians 4:13, claiming once again that he can do all things through Christ who gives Him strength. He smiled so big and thanked me for reminding him.

My prayer today is that God will show us all
D6 moments with our children so we can help them become can-do kids in Christ!

I also wanted to share promises God used with Gideon in Judges 6 to help him become a can-do kid:

  • I am with you. v.12 When the angel of the LORD appeared to Gideon, he said, "The LORD is with you, mighty warrior."
  • Focus on the strength you have. v.14 The LORD turned to him and said, "Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian's hand. Am I not sending you?"

  • You can do it! Remember, I am with you. v.16 The LORD answered, "I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites together."
I didn't realize it then, but as I look back I see practical ways I applied this process and these promises with Andrew that day in the kitchen:
  • I drew his attention away from something he couldn’t do and focused it toward something he could do.

  • I showed him how to do it, and then I did it with him.

  • Once he gained his confidence, I stepped back and watched as he completed his assignment with success.

  • We celebrated the reality of his new name and talked about how good it felt to do new things.
God is so good! I love that these steps we can take with our children in various situations as we become a Can-Do Moms who are raising Can-Do Kids!

Copyright 2009. Renee Swope - All rights reserved.

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Great Give-Aways for Moms

We're giving away two D6-mom resources today, that include one copy of "Revolutionary Parenting" and one copy of my "Mining for Gold in the Heart of Your Child" CD and chart to be selected from your comments today. Be sure to include your email in your comment so we can contact you if you win the give-away. Here are some things I'd love to know:

Has there been a time when you were able to share a promise or spiritual truth with your child in an everyday life moment? What hinders you or helps you look for those teachable moments? Are there other ways you are passing on your faith to your child? I'd love to hear your thoughts, stories and/or questions.

Every Friday, we'll be giving away two tickets to the D6 Conference. So be sure to come back for more encouragement and resources from D6 and Proverbs 31 Ministries!

Be sure to include your email so we can contact you if you win the give-away.


116 Comments:

Blogger Heather Conrad said...

Good morning Renee!
I too have a child who is reluctant in trying anything he might remotely be close to failing. As God has taken me on a journey of running, he has been watching. After attending a few races, God opened an opportunity to simply share what I have been learning through the same scripture verse, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." But honestly, it's the moments where I don't feel the pressure to have to impart wisdom that will make or break my child, but one that comes so naturally from my words and actions because it's so real in my life. It's then I know for sure it's the Lord working, and that is when my child can see faith fleshed out.

On a practical note, one of the phrases I find myself repeating often is, "Emma, you need to brush your teeth a little bit longer". One night, I found myself saying, "Emma, why don't you try singing a song while you brush your teeth, that way you'll know when your time is up?" Honestly, it came out half-heartedly, a moment when I was thinking about something else, not consciously giving eye-contact, or giving any confidence that it could work. For three days now, I've been beautiful blessed with a hummed rendition of "Angels We Have Heard On High", and it's the most beautiful sound. AND her teeth are sparkling! Thank you Jesus!

One concept my husband and I are discussing currently is how to instill encouragement in our son (currently playing Upwards basketball), yet simultaneously balancing it with the right lessons in being humble as well as a teammate. His confidence is WAY TOO bolstered at the moment and it comes out in a belittling fashion (He's one with a matter-of-fact manner, not realizing his knowledge comes across rude and arrogant at times). I do believe there are verses in Proverbs to direct us to, just can't think of them off-hand.

Thanks for this post Renee!

Blogger Preachin Patrick said...

Hi! Thanks for sharing your personal story of helping your son! I have a friend who is really struggling right now with her 7 yr old son and I am going to pass it along to her! My son has just turned 2 and we are so excited to be able to see him learning about God and the Bible. We are currently teaching him through the use of songs. He learns them so quickly!! Then we talk about what the song means. It is hard to know how much he actually understands, but at least we know he is hearing it! His favorite right now is Bee Humble. What a good lesson for all of us!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good Morning,

The Lord has blessed me with opportunity to homeschool my 3 children. I praise the Lord for this, especially since my husband had a not so good experience with homeschool himself as a child.
To add to the blessing, my dh is an unbeliever.

There are many times that I become afraid that the children would rather follow after daddy.

But His grace is sufficient. My heart is filled with joy, when I hear them playing with "the sword of the spirit"... or when one of them encourages the other to have the same attitude of Christ Jesus.

Praise the Lord. I can sow the seeds, and He will always give the increase. Though not perfect in my seedsowing :D

One area we are working on this month is specifically kindness, as one fruit of the spirit. It amazes me the lessons we learn together, and how each seed grows in their hearts.

My children question this week has been "what kind of fruit is growing in your garden?" A phrase I used when talking about the fruit of the Spirit :D

So many times I do not measure up as the "spiritual" parent. Unfortunately, there are probably times it is hard to tell the believing parent from the unbelieving parent. But at all times God is good! Sometimes, I wonder why I have been blessed with my 3... but the Lord has been good to me. And there is no error in His ways!

With purpose,
Anonymous

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee..
May I share on behalf of my precious daughter in law? Our family has been shaken to its core when over the holidays my son left this wonderful girl and my 3 year old grandson for a woman he met on the Internet. We have had a D6 family for generations but Satan's hold on my son began with pornography and has been festering. Now it has come to a head an spilled its putrifying effects on so many people.
Through these last few days my daughter in law has been consistent in her devotional time with their son. She points him to God and calmly explains how sin has affected his daddy and how sin means we disobey God and His word. From the depths of her sorrow, she has been able to show godly strength when dealing with our grandson and continuously teaches him God's truth and scripture even in the midst of this ordeal. She is pouring God's word into him faithfully as they sit, as they walk, as they lie down, as they rise up. She is able to contain her grief in my grandson's presence and has displayed a strong faith in the Lord which is the greatest 'can-do' example I can think of.
We live states away and wouldn't be able to attend any type of conference but I wanted you and others who read this blog to know God is Faithful. He honors obedience to Him and His word. No matter what happens in our lives our children must see that our faith is real, that it is practical, that it 'works' in all situations so they can pick up the torch and carry that light even when some who go before them have dropped it so miserably. We covet the prayers of God's people throughout this land.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good morning! I loved your devotional and it has come right on time as I struggle to encourage my oldest son to "never give up". Last year my 8 yr old son was accused of writing a mean message to another student. We talked about the situation and he tearfully told me that he didn't do it. I told him to remember that God is our avenger and we prayed. The teacher soon found out that it wasn't my son who wrote the message when the real culprit later confessed. It was very hard to see my son go through this, but I am thankful that my son learned that he can depend on the Lord in any situation, good or bad.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I try to use Jesus and the Bible whenever I can especially when they are afraid like ' the Lord has plans for us to prosper...' The problem that hinders me is that I need to learn more verses off hand and the ones that I do remember are more for repermanding like 'take the log out of your own eye before taking the splinter out of your brothers'.........I feel the best way to past on my faith is just in the way I live and interact with others. Thats a big one. In a society that is rude and selfish I need to show my kids the opposite. My one child tends to be selfish at home but at school I find she sticks up for friends, tries not to gossip and is kind to everyone. Something I'm saying is getting through!!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just found your blog today for the first time, and in a very timely way! I have 3 girls, ages 6,9, and 12. We continually have a problem with losing important things like Brownie vests, party invitations, etc. I was really stressing over a few lost things this morning and the verses you mentioned, esp Phil 4:13 were so encouraging. My girls need to feel strengthened at the beginning of our day, not discouraged, so thank you for lifting my spirits Godward!

Blogger Amy McCrary said...

Thanks for your insight. It becomes so discouraging when you can't find the right words to give to your child to encourage him. I'm praying to be a "can do" family.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Has there been a time when you were able to share a promise or spiritual truth with your child in an everyday life moment?

The truth is that difficulties in our lives are great opportunities to share God with our children, but sometimes we shy away from those areas because we don't want our children to see us as weak or unstable. My husband and I went through a difficult situation for several years. He was in an job where there were some dishonest practices going on, although he was innocent. He tried his best to defend himself, but it appeared he may be brought to trial and had little defense. There was a very real possibility that he would be tried, found guilty and sent to jail-for a crime he had no part of. During that time, we felt it was best for our kids to be sheltered from the issues as we felt they wouldn't understand and would just cause them to be fearful, so we waited.
When the trial had finally come to an end ( a mere 4 1/2 years later!) we were able to share with them the hardship we faced, along with the fear and the real emotions we were feeling. Above all else, we were able to share with them how God used this unfortunate event to bring their father to Christ, how He took care of us and worked through us, and how faithful God is to His children. We pointed out how many of God's promises were proven true during the hardship, and reminded them of the awesome promise of Salvation through Jesus Christ.
Several weeks after that, my then 15 year old son made a commitment to the Lord and did an "about-face" in his life!
Since then, God has been using our children as vessels of His light for others. Our home is one that is centered on the Lord, and I am anxious to see how the Lord will work in our family to bring Him honor and glory as HE continues to be faithful to all of His promises to us.
He can be trusted in any situation because He NEVER breaks a promise. He is there, He has your best in mind, and He loves you unconditionally. How great is that?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heather Mikelson
vikefan42@joimail.com

Blogger kristen said...

Great devotional on Prov 31. I have an Andrew who is much the same way. He is a twin and his brother really doesn't get frustrated or care when he can't do most things. So it is a challenge to encourage my Andrew to try things over and over to learn how to do something. I loved the sugesstion to try something different. I usually try hand over hand help or he does part I finish it. I love to see his face light up when he does something he thinks he can't do. I have tried to use the same scripture to help him know that God is with him in all things he tries to do.
They are singers and love to memorize and learn by song, especially Andrew. We are also in the process of using the "Right Choice Bible" as a devotional for them. They look forward to it and ask for it everyday.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello,
Low self-concept and fear of failing seem to plague our whole family. It is difficult to watch our sons "give up"...some who are teen and pre-teen. (Even our eldest son who is past teen years struggles at times.) They seem held back by fears. At that age they don't verbalize well what is truly in their heart and it often comes out in angry bursts of frustration. My heart aches for them because I know they have it in them to do well...with God's help but I don't know how to let them know that in a way they will accept.

How do you encourage them without being embroiled in the frustration of their seeming lack of interest?...It's as if they don't care. They hide behind video games and things that they know they can do well and avoid challenges to become all that they can be.

My children are older...do these things work for them? Is it too late to input into their lives a "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." attitude?

And when a parent such as myself has been pulling the load of trying to train the kids and get them to do what is right...and yet feels like such a failure myself...when one gets so weary from the journey...how do we get encouraged again?

Maybe sometimes it "mom" that needs the "can-do" attitude...that is my case...how I long for an encouraging word from someone who really believes in me...and from God Himself.

Looking for Gods' shalom!

4apurpose@att.net

Blogger Jennifer said...

Thank you for this information! Just last night I was helping my daughter Shelby with her math homework. I asked her to get out the worksheet and lets look at it, she says to me I can't do it! I said sure you can. No mom I can't do it. She says this a lot when it comes to school work. She has struggled the last couple years and I have struggled with ways to help her. I continually pray for her. This mornings post is going to help me a lot. We got through the math worksheet and she did very well and when it was all finished I said to her see you can do it. She was excited and I was proud of her. God is continually giving me little gifts for my life like this blog. Thank you so much!

Blogger Jill Beran said...

Renee, great words once again. First of all I'm thankful for your message that I can be a "can-do Mom" needed to hear that today!!

But as far as my kids I think the amazing thing for me is the desire they have to want to know and their ability to remember. My oldest is almost 6 and next in line just turned 4 and they surprise me at times. Our MOPS mentor once spoke about making faith part of your daily life and don't "dumb" it down for kids. If the spirit is working they will get it! That is so true. Just the other day my five year old came and asked me to open my Bible so we could read about the 10 plagues. He wanted to know and has talked about it since even when he has disobeyed. I am homeschooling him now and have had moments of "I can't" but we too have referred to Phil. and in those moments we have the oppportunity to pause and pray, which has been a blessing. It usually comes at a time when I'm feeling like "I can't" too.

It is just an honor and blessing to see their faith grow and watch them make connections. And at the same time mine is grownig too. Really it's not because we are doing anything special or outlandish, but simply trying to live our faith and share it with them on a daily basis in the big things and the small.

Blessings, Jill

Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a mother of 5, this made me stop and think that I need to focus on what each of the kids can do instead of what others think they should be able to do.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love the stories and lessons that you have to offer. I have been blessed many times reading your emails and website.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for your story,
As a mom of 5 I have been in this situation with my daughter. She has a reading disability and needed a lot of encouragement to achieve the simple tasks her siblings were doing all around her. She was also doing gymnastics and was afraid of the vault. An understandable fear since her coach wanted her to run at it with all her might and throw her body over it without any caution. This seemed like an impossible task and we feared her unable to continue with the sport. We prayed together before every practice and God lead me to relate her situation to Goliath and the Giant (vault). Using the scripture I a can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me, my daughters confidence was lifted and she conquered her fear. As God often does, he didn't just get her over the vault but went on to help her win first place at her first meet in the vault competition. My daughter is about 10 years older now and her favorite verse is still, I can do all things through Christ....... She has used it to overcome any challenges in her life including her reading disability. She now is an avid reader and a full time college student while still in her senior year of high school. Praise God for the struggles our small children go through and the opportunities God gives us to train them in His ways. They make such a difference in their future lives and who they will be as adults living for Christ.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is just what I needed today after my five year old complained about everything and was totally unhappy for the third day in a row. I said a little prayer and said that I didn't know what I needed to do to help her have better days and I was struggling thinking that I needed to make changes in me. Thank you for always being such an encouragement.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My nine year old daughter spent the last few months on the playground with a girl being mean. We talked about it often and prayed for her. We would pray on the way to school everyday and the bible verse we memorized was Exodus 14:14, Be still and quiet , I will fight for you. A few months later after a hard day on the playground the little girl called to say she was sorry. You should have seen the look in my daughters eyes. That led us onto another discussion concerning God's timetable and his plans for us. One door opened another for discussions and our praying ritual on the way to school has continued and has been such a blessing.
bradandmelissak@yahoo.com

Blogger The Rouse House said...

I was so thankful for the P31 devotional today. My 5 year old tends to use that lovely phrase often, and of course his younger brother has picked up on it too. I will be looking for things to encourange them in so they can learn to think of themselves as Can-Do Kids!

One of my daily desires is to teach my kids God lessons in everyday situations. Deuteronomy 6 is one of my favorite passages as a mom! Because of the hectic pace of life I often don't take time for those special teaching moments. Yesterday my son was on a talking tangent about Star Wars. I took that moment to tell him that what goes into our minds is what we become. The most important thing we can put into our minds is God's word so we can become more like Jesus.

Angie
angierouse@gmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good morning, Renee - I have come across this information at the right time. My 8th grade son is having the hardest time with his very "mean" teacher and strongly feels that the only way to take care of the situation is to get out of her class. This has been my frustration for almost 2 months now. I prayed for God to show me the ways to deal with this better as a Mom and to give me the tools to help my child. I have not arrived by chance, but by divine intervention. Praise God!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow! When I read your devotion today it was an answer to my prayers. For the last two mornings my eleven year old son has struggled with getting ready for school. He has some eczema on his face and it has flared up for the last couple of mornings. Upon noticing how he looks he then becomes extrememly frustrated and then the tears begin. Which in turn makes it a lot worse. As I prayed for my son asking Jesus to provide him with strength and peace I also encouraged him to go in his room to pray and just relax. Getting himself together in order to hop on the bus in time. Each day he made it. And so yesterday after school I gave him a card letting him know just how proud I am of him for finding strength and getting himself together. Wishing him that tomorrow would bring a better morning. I am happy to report that indeed today was a better morning for him and in turn for me. It is so hard for us parents to see our children struggle. Even though we know that struggles are an important part of our lives as Christians. Thank you for perfect timing with your blogs. I am excited to learn more about D6 and to read through Deuteronomy 6:5-9

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This has turned on so many different lightbulbs in my head. I shared with my bible study group last Sunday night that one of my goals is to grasp the "teaching" moments and not be frustrated when my kids disrupt what I am involved in at the time. I feel that my boys, in their own way, are hungry for God's will. My 7yo said that his #1 wish for Christmas was to "hear" God, then #2 a PS2! That kinda frightened me bc I realized that he is starting to grasp things of the heart and I really don't want to mess up. This "can do" attitude is going to be a great thing for ME along with my 2 boys. I so look forward to what God lays on your heart to share with us.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee! You just described MY 4-year old. He has two older siblings that are quite independent and instead of emulating them, he is discouraged by their success. Thank you for sharing and offering some tips for supporting our children.
Jude 2,
Emily

Blogger Renee Swope said...

Thank you so much for sharing your hearts and your stories. I love reading them and I know you are all encouraging one another, too! I am praying for each mom, grandmother, and friend who stops by today. Share what is on your heart and we will try to answer lots of your great questions and talk about things you bring up as we go along. If we don't cover it all in Jan, we'll keep talking in the months that follow.

Be sure you leave your email in your comment, too, so we can contact you if you win a give-away.

Remember, YOU are a can-do mom/kid too!
Renee

Blogger Momma Shoe said...

Praise the Lord for leading me to your site today! I have four children (age 5 and under) and am always looking for sound Christian parenting advice and suggestions.

I think the thing that hinders me most in constantly sharing the truth of God's Word with my children is my own lack of Scripture memorization. I am relatively new to in-depth Bible study and am still trying to hide God's promises in my own heart and mind. This year as I read Scripture, I am highlighting God's promises in yellow, and His attributes/character in orange, so I can more easily reference and absorb them any time I open up my Bible. I pray that it will help me impart them on my children more often! But I, myself, must know my Scripture first, in order to be able to past the Truth on to my children in everyday situations.

So most of the time I use songs or hymns, which often times contain (or are based on) direct Scripture. I love music and songs stick with me so easily. This morning my 5 year old said she wanted to stay home with us today instead of going to Kindergarten, so as we waited for the bus, I showered her with songs, such as This is the Day (that the Lord has made). It put a smile on her face and helped her put on the right attitude as she headed off for a day at public school.
I look forward to visiting your site often. Thanks for what you do!

Blogger boatgirl said...

Renee I loved this devotion today. I have two boys who are completely different. Our Gideon, age 6, is very outgoing while our Ken, is very laid back and kind of in his big brother's shadow. We are trying to encourage Ken on the things that he does well and he loves the praise. There are teachable moments in everything, even when us parents blow it. I want to thank you all at P31 for your encouragement to us Moms.

Blogger Tcathey said...

Good Morning,

I continue to instill my son (who is now 5) the same truths that my mother instilled in me. Ever since he learned how to talk and began to form the words "I can't" in his mouth - I quickly corrected him.

At first I would tell him that in our house "I can't" is a naughty word and instead we say "Mommy, I need help."

As he grew older he began to understand that "I can't" really wasn't a bad word & asked me to explain it. So I told him (and continue to this day) that really there is no such thing as "I can't"... Instead it's "I can, if I try". It's to the point now where he will correct himself whenever he begins to say the words "I can't". He even corrects me when I mistakenly say those words. lol... It's great to watch him take on most challenges that are set before him & usually when he gets stumped - he knows how to now ask for help instead of giving up.

Blogger mommyof2sons said...

Thank you! I love your story of helping your son!!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Renee!

Thanks so much for your post today and for the reminder that we, as parents, have the primary responsibility for instilling God's Word in the hearts of our children while they are young. I have always tried to use the everyday situations we encounter to remind my children of God's Word and what it says about particular situations - sometimes, because of the busy-ness of life, I get a little lax in pointing out how God's Word applies to everything we encounter. So, I appreciate the reminder!

You asked for us to recount a time when we were able to share a promise or spiritual truth with our child in an everyday life moment. My son, who is now 13, has many characteristics that are on the autism spectrum (Asperger's) but has not been "officially" diagnosed with Asperger's because he has other characteristics that are not typical of children with autism. He attends a private, Christian school, and struggles with certain aspects of school-work and socializing. He often feels like he doesn't "fit in." On several different occasions, when he has felt particularly frustrated and discouraged about not "fitting in" at school, I have been able to remind him of Psalm 139 - that he is fearfully and wonderfully made and that God made him just the way he is on purpose. God put him together that way for a purpose (Jeremiah 29:11) and I remind him that God has special plans for him using the exact gifts and talents that he has. What a wonderful and gracious God we have that He would put these promises and reminders in His Word just for us to know that nothing is by accident and that He has a perfect plan for everything and everyone!

I really appreciate your D6 focus right now and look forward to more lessons and ideas on how to implement them!

Blessings on your day! Teri

Blogger Lori said...

Hello Renee
I am a mother of a 7 year old with a mild case Cerebral Palsy and a very busy 3 year old. Our roles are reversed. Ellie (7) has a hard time keeping up with her little brother and get's the "I can't". Right now Ellie has a cast on her left foot to help with her CP and having a hard time with snow pants (lovely MN winter). Today was better than the last few, but with your story about Andrew helps us to always trust in God and his word.
Thank you for sharing your Andrew and for giving me inspiration to keep God in EVERYTHING we do.
Lori

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I keep verses on the mirror so we can read them while brushing our teeth. One of the many verses I like is Heb 13:5. I will never leave you or forsake. That is a promise that we know God will be with us whenever or whatever we do.

Thank you for your devotions, they really speak to my heart.

Blogger Judy said...

Wow!! this truly is God-sent!! I've been searching,waiting, and praying for a ministry such as this. A guide/support group to help me see practical ways in which to instill in my 3 children Godly values that will equip them to confront all the issues and pressures that they will face in adulthood. I realize the importance of scripture memory and the value of just praying for the future of our children. so thank you for D6!!!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Morning! I get the P31 devotions each day and I was glued to yours this morning and for the first time I decided to venture to one of the links and it was your blog. Oh, how I was blessed!! I wanted to find out what D6 was all about and it took me to yesterdays writing and the You Tube clip and I was blessed again. I have 3 children and the majority of the time they are can-do kids but they have moments and I thank you for sharing your story. I will definetly be visitng your blog again and I thank Jesus for using you to reach so many moms.

Blogger Tatum said...

I was chatting to my kids as we drove about how God provides for us. They talked about the "things" that God was providing for our family. As we turned the corner to go through a drive through for lunch we saw a homeless couple standing at the side of the road. As children do they asked what the sign said that they were holding, why they didn't have a home, why the were hungry. Difficult questions to answer and yet my seven year old didn't miss a beat as he uggested we buy them lunch and take it to them.
I smiled as I thought about how the conversation before not only allowed for a "Jesus moment "but gave my children an opportunity to "live" as Jesus did.
We bought lunch took it to the family and as we drove away, my daughter asked me if Jesus was smiling...a tear slid down my cheek as I turned and answered YES!
In a moment where I thought I was teaching my children they reminded me that in everything we do it is for His pleasure!
It was an experience I will never forget.

Blogger Joanie Butler said...

Hi Renee,
As you know I have been utilizing your "Mining for Gold" principles for some time now. I think that my biggest struggle is just seeing the gold. My son is sooooo very strong-willed and too often I get sucked down into the muck and mud of his poor choices and bad behaviors and I forget to look for the good that creeps in from time to time. I am praying about this a lot and trying to do better. Please continue to pray for us!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks Renee for this post! I just had a D6 moment last night with my 12 year daughter. She is a tender hearted child with a very big temper. As she moves to her teenage years the attitude of course is growing. I had several moments of discipline for that attitude last night. Before she went to bed she came and sat at the end of my bed and said "I don't know what to do?". I asked, "about what". My temper and attitude. We had a lengthy discussion about just what you discribed in your post. How you alone can't do it. But in Christ all things are possible. We talked about prayer and it's power. She didn't understand how praying could help her. So we talked about how and when to pray about her attitude. It's something I think she is going to continue to struggle with. But I know God can help her through it. And as long as we keep our eyes on him, I know she will prevail! Thanks so much for your website and daily devotions. They keep my thoughts in check everyday! ><>

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,

Thank you once again for sharing the truths you have learned along the way. I used the Phillipians verse with my son. His timed math fact tests have been a struggle. He knows them, but he gets flustered when he gets into a timed situation. We prayed this verse for him.

carlson2398@roadrunner.com

Blogger Caroline G. said...

Hi Renee,
I just read your encouraging words and can relate to the "I can't do it" drama of a child. I have a 7 year old girl that can get pretty emotional about the silliest things, including socks.... But that is part of the fun of having a child, which can be frustrating. But through encouragement and worship our family stays strong along with a huge dose of laughter...

Thank you, I look forward to reading more of your stories in the future.

Caroline

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Blessings to you, Renee:

Sometimes I am that child who is reluctant to try something new because I find such comfort in what I already know. I worry that this has rubbed off on my kids too! I want to be an example of trusting in Christ, knowing that I CAN DO all things because of Him, and Him alone!

Thanks for your message today; it hit home and encouraged me to be more of an encouragement to my kids!

Suzanne Bethurum
His4evrNow@aol.com

Blogger Caroline G. said...

Oh forgot, my email is galbraith_caroline@yahoo.com

Caroline

Anonymous Anonymous said...

a much needed lesson for me today. If I am a can't do mom then how do I teach my children to be "can-do" kids. Be careful little ears what you hear...I am going to do my best to be the Can-do Mom that they need me to be and instead of getting frustrated and overwhelmed with all of the things I think I can't get done today, I know I can!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee--
I'm struggling this morning with my oldest daughter, who's in kindergarten. She's argumentative by nature and we're working on that, but this morning it was to the nth degree. Her motto seemed to be, 'no matter what it is, it's not what I wanted.' She argued and fell apart over everything from her clothes to her toast to her boots. I know we all have bad mornings, but I also know that this is a heart issue. It just came out in a much bigger way this morning. I'm praying and searching for the right way to help her change her attitude and her heart. Perhaps developing in her an attitude of gratitude? That came to me as I prayed this morning, but not sure yet whether that was God's suggestion or my own! Coveting prayers and suggestions,
Holly
spanglerholly@hotmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a 16 year old who believes the best way to handle life is to "do only as much as you have to" - NEVER do more than is expressly required, don't stand out or strive for excellence and yet, won't try things if he is not confident that he can do them well(perfectly) - he doesn't like to make mistakes and re-try. I try to use life to bring God and scriptural truths home to him, but he is very resistant right now - so I leave him in God's hands for I know that "I" cannot bring him to God, only God can cause him to awaken to His truth and to seek and see Him. I never did as much encouraging of him as I thought when he was younger. I was a single mother and caught up in trying to make ends meet and being overwhelmed by my circumstances. But, thanks to God's love and Jesus' sacrifice, I have been saved and I CAN DO all things through Christ who strengthens me. His grace is sufficient to overcome my inabilities as a parent. Barbara-Ann D'Aguilar

Blogger MJ said...

I have a son who is reluctant to step out and stretch himself. The challenge is getting him to understand that God and we always expect his best. We struggle with our frustration with this challenge on a daily basis.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for this post!! I have a child who is 7 and cannot tie his shoes and is constantly saying "I Cannot do this". Among other things he struggles with doing. This helps me so much and gives me hope in that I can show him things he can do and not get so frustrated which in turn makes me sad and like a helpless parent. As the saying goes "Leave it in Gods hands and he will provide". Again, thank you so much for your guidance and help.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi!

Thanks for your devotional this AM. I realized that my 2 year old son loves to do what he is good at (me too). Anything he has difficulty with, he just stops trying. This gives me some ideas for teaching him perseverence without discouraging him.

rtcoleman@verizon.net

Blogger misty said...

Thank you so much for your story about your son. I know what you mean. I have a 7 year old son and two step sons 6 and 4. Sometimes it hard for all of them to try new tasks. The 4 year old just started pre-K and has had some issues getting settled in. The other main issue we have is the children talking hateful to each other. We have recently started using scripture for them to understand that Jesus does not like hateful words. We have started using WWJD..everytime one of them talks or acts in a hateful manner, we ask them, "Would Jesus say that, would Jesus like those hateful words?" It has really seems to help. Hopefully God will continue to put words in our mouths as parents and actions in our body to raise our children to be Godly people and pass it on to the next generations!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing. We have one child who is a perfectionist and sometimes won't even try a new activity because she may fail. After reading your devotion, we will encourage her by praying the verse in Phillipians and showing her how to be a "can-do" kid!

kerri_c_johnson@yahoo.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Renee! I also have a child who is always reluctant to try anything he might come close to failing. He is 11 years old, and has pretty much always been like this. We see this in sports and school. He is a wonderful athlete, and an average student, but just doesn't seem to have a passion for anything. My husband and I struggle to try to find things he's good at and encourage him in those things, because he always seems to be indifferent about everything.

My struggle is not being familiar with the Bible myself enough to know where to look for scriptures that pertain to certain issues. I would love to be able to just pull a verse out of my head to share with him during those "teachable moments", but I don't have them. Once I've taken the time to look them up (if I can even find them), I feel like I've lost the moment.

I was not raised in a family that went to church and we didn't really talk about God. I have not memorized scripture and am usually not familiar with most of the Bible stories I often hear in Bible Studies, etc. I am trying to find a time during each day to spend with God, but I struggle because it's not something I'm used to doing. I know if I can do this, it will help. But every time I try (using devotions, etc.), I don't stick with it. I've prayed for God to help me in this area, but still struggle. Do you have any other suggestions for me? Any would be much appreciated. Thanks for the post!

Blogger Casey S. said...

I feel so blessed to be able to read your blog and learn soooo much. Thank you and everyone for all your insight. You are such an inspiration. As one of the anonymous said, I feel I don't measure up like I should as a spiritual parent either. I feel like I struggle but pray and pray and I know God is helping me. My 9 year old and myself are learning so much together and Phil. 4:13 is posted on my fridge at home along with a few others. You are a true blessing!!
Thank you.
cswartz12@msn.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,
Thank you for yur encouragement. I home school my two children. My daughter is a true first born. She is 9 and in 4th grade. My son is 6 and we decided to start him in Kindergarten this year vs last. He has had no desire to learn. But, I'm encouraged because he is showing signs of interest. I look forward to utilizing your D6 challenge. Thank you!Jennie

Blogger Melanie said...

Thank you for reminding me to continually and constantly turn to His word for answers to life's everyday challenges. It is so easy to slip into a wordly perspective of "how can I fix this" instead of "how does God want me to live my life and teach my children to live in obedience to Him." Not that life doesn't present problems and troubles, but that if I can rest in His assurance and truth, I always find that I am less likely to take it all on myself -likewise teaching my children not to live out of their own strenght!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My daugher is 21 months old and loves to sing and dance. She learns new words and letter sounds everyday it seems like. Last week she learned to pray. Now she will grab my hand or her dad's hand and will close her eyes and wait for one of us to pray. She does this before we eat and usually after every bite for the first 10+ bites, when she gets buckled into her car seat, when she is sitting on the "big" potty (as we try to potty train, when sitting on the couch watching cartoons and when she goes to bed at night. It amases me how often she asks us to pray with her. She has taught me to believe like a child again.

Now she is no perfect angel...she gets mad when she doesn't get her way. To show us she is mad she throws whatever she can grab at the moment and bangs her head on the floor until it hurts and will go pout in her room sometimes for 30 minutes or more. I tried telling her it is ok to get mad but not to act out like she does when she is mad but I don't think she understood. Then I had to think back and review how I act when I am angry...I tend to yell and shake and point my finger at her...I had to change my reactions and start responding in Christ like manner instead of reacting first. This has helped. It amases me how much she learns from watching me. I need to watch Christ's examples that closely as I read His word.

Blogger shalom09 said...

Hi Renee
What a blessing it has been to have your daily emails and to read the comments shared by so may that encourage parents,facing difficult times.I am one of those mothers .
I have a 9 year old daughter who has had sever allergies since the age of 9 months, we have been in an out of hospitals and doctors and they came up with Celiac disease and autoimmune conditions as well as food,drug,dye and any indoor or out door allegens.

I have taken your" D6 can do moments " and created special times were I could help her through the rough times of "no you can't eat that or go there or do that".

As a parent and christian I realize how important it is to share with her how to moments and over ride the "I can't" because they seem to be so many. At times I feel am I doing it right? and wonder can I do this Lord ? And then I read your email and again I am en powered and faith and hope renter my heart and my spirit is open to try again and that has become so wonderful for me.

Thank you for this gift.The emails, books and comments have made such an impact on my family, our church ministry and my 3 year old preschool class room.

Erica has moments were we redo "I can and I can't " as the school parties and field trips and special events come up, but we have found grace and joy in solving them together as a family.

Gods grace is open for all who need it and daily we have chosen to make "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"
a scripture that starts off our day difficult or not we have a goal to overcome them.

In Christ Didi Gray

Blogger Unknown said...

I struggle with this issue but with my daughter, who is sweet and very sensitive and gives up at the first sign of trouble or mental discomfort. She is 7 and I wonder if we'll ever get past this. I've tried to draw her out by practicing with her or letting her know that I fail all the time and it's OK.

Blogger René S said...

One of the challenges I face is having time with each child alone. It seems often questions come up when both kids are with me (often in the car), but they aren't both asking a question. It is sometimes hard to present age appropriate information with children who are not on the same developmental level at the same time! Thanks for the encouragement.

Blogger leanne said...

Thank you Renee for your wisdom in your journey of parenting.

I find myself,batteling the strength to continue to repeat the promise that has been told to me to tell my children. I feel as though I say the same thing over and over, and over; but then I am reminded that no one is going to love my children as I do, therefore I need to be consistent in what I say.

God's word is not there for me to read one time, it is a lifetime process...so I shouldn't expect my children to get it one time and then..poof! They are all fixed.

One setback in our home is grumbling and complaining. I get so sick and tired of it it makes me want to scream! We have discussed the Isrealites and thier complaining and how they did not move forward. We have hung Philippians 2:14 (Do everything without complaining or arguing NIV) on the refigerator until we knew that we knew it. So when we are in the store I can say, Emily are you grumbling and complaining?

But sometimes saying the verse doesn't ring in thier ears as I had planned. So now when the heat needs to be turned down, we turn up in song. For instance, if we are cleaning up the house and there is ALOT of you know what goign in...I have my kids start to sing "rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say Rejoice..." It has been very effective in turning bad attitudes around. My kids go from thinking selfishly to singing to the Lord.

Blogger Carol said...

Dear Renee!
Thank you for your post! I can't even tell you how much it spoke to my heart. Just that fact that there is someone else out there who has a son who has anxiety just helped me know that I'm not alone.
My son is 11. He's tender. Which I think will be an asset to him in life. However, it also makes him more succeptible to pain and anxiety. He had a rough start at school this year. Anxiety attacks and lots of tears. It was a very difficult time but I saw his faith grow and for me, who had previously wondered if he'd ever choose to follow Christ, this was a wonderful thing to happen as a result of the trial he was going through.
After a vacation from school, the anxiety has started again and we (my husband and I ) continue to remind him how GREAT God was in the same situation 3 months ago. He tends to want to sit and mope and share all the bad things going on in his little life right now. We've encouraged him to think about the positive things

Phil. 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

It has been a very difficult season for our family. Both my mom and my husband's dad spent Christmas in the hospital. I am an emotional wreck and clinging to the Lord. I can't pray without weeping and although I'd like to shield my kids from this hard part of life, they learn in the process that while we go through difficult times, we cling to GOD and GOD ALONE. And His grace will be sufficient for our every breath.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for sharing your heart. I felt as if it was from God to me!

Happy New Year!

Carol
themusician@sympatico.ca

Blogger Joyful said...

My 83 year old mother has adopted and modified the Home Depot slogan. The advertisements for the Home Depot say, "You can do it. We can help." My Mom tells herself, "You can do it. HE can help." As she faces the challenges that growing older brings, she places her trust in the Lord and knows her strength comes from Him.

In the summer, my teenage son and I try to walk early every morning. On our walks we try and look for ways to see God and use these as teachable moments. I remember one day we were approaching a stoplight and I used it to remind him that sometimes God gives direction by saying Go, Stop or slow down and wait a while. Other days it would be as simple as seeing a flower and talking about our prayers rising as a sweet smelling fragrance to the Lord. A tree would lead to a discussion of having our roots grow deep in His Word. Little cracks in the sidewalk would introduce a discussion on our lives being 'cracked' and God forgiving sin and using our cracks to let His light shine forth.

I found it got more of a challenge to find teachable moments as my son got older, but they are still there if we're looking and asking the Lord to help us see them.

Just yesterday as our young, new neighbour was scrapping ice off her car to leave for work, my son and I discussed how we could try and get ready ten minutes earlier so we could do that for her. As we talked about this, I shared with my son that, even thinking that idea was God. He put that desire on our hearts. That was God speaking.

Keeping my heart open to more teachable moments,
Joy

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love both of these posts because instilling faith through daily teachable moments and regular routines is just what we're trying to do! This may be basic to everyone else, but it was definitely an 'aha' moment when I got this. I have my regular devotion time in the morning, so now we have a short devotional time with our three-year-old each evening at bedtime. My husband and I are trying to learn more scripture, so we're going to start our own little family program to encourage each other to learn more verses at dinnertime each evening. We look for ways that we can help other people and talk about how that makes God happy. Our daughter loves reading her Bible book, as she calls it, and loves church, too. We recently started a Bible study for Mommies where we're talking about just these sorts of things - about how to instill faith into our children - and I've learned a lot from there.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for your article. It is very timely. I am a homeschooling mother of 3 and God has been working on my mouth and the things I say to people, especially my children. He has been working on this in me for a while, but in earnest since Monday!! It is awesome how God works all things together to walk us step-by-step to be more like Christ! ;-) It is especially wonderful when He puts something on your heart, you are obedient and then He confirms it through an article, devotion or in some other way right after you are obedient! Just this morning I encouraged my 3 year old daughter to clean the breakfast table. She is the youngest and I think she tends to feel like she can’t do much since her older brother and sister go off and play baseball together, etc. So, to read your article after that was like a kiss from God and like He picked up my hand to walk me the next step!

I hope your day is blessed.
In Christ’s Love,
Carolyn McNabb

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just read your devotion on being a CAN-DO KID. I loved it. My boys are grown and out of the house, but I can still apply the principles when I talk with them. I can speak to them and treat them like Gideon - a mighty man of God - even though they are not YET! I don't want to look at them with disappointment; I want to look at them seeing their potential.

I can also apply the truths to myself. I am a CAN-DO KID because I'm God's child.
Thanks for sharing. You made me really think today!
Love you,
E.B.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,
Thanks for your encouragement. I too have had to deal with the "can't do's" from my 6 year old. He is very reluctant to try new things on his own. Before he stared Kindergarten this past fall we memorized a Bible that would help him be brave..."the Lord is on my side, I shall not fear". Leading up to the big day when I dropped him off in his new classroom and left him we went back to that verse with each nervous question or each anxious comment. Those were the last words I tearfully whispered to him as he walked into his classroom that first day. He walked in bravely, said "Bye Mom" and didn't look back. Now, of course, there are many more milestones ahead of us but that little verse helped my little guy walk through a BIG one!

Thanks for letting me share my story! Now I'm off to pick him up from Kindergarten!

Blessings,
Alesha Moreno

amoreno@carolina.rr.com

Blogger Luanne said...

I have witnessed fear hold myself back, and then my children. God does not give us a spirit of fear. Thanks

Blogger momagain67 said...

Renee,

Thank you for sharing your moment of parenting triumph! It sounds like a lot of us today needed to hear it. I am the mother of 15yr and 5yr old daughters. One would think with the large age gap I wouldn't have to face the typical rivalries and comparisons that most moms deal with...one would THINK that, but oh not so! I'm afraid sometimes it just exacerbates things :) This 5th yr with my youngest has been the most challenging for me-- and yes we get a heavy dose of the "I can'ts". Through lots of prayer, patience and perseverance we are overcoming most of the problems. We read from the Bible together for 15 minutes each evening before bedtime and then usually fit in a "Key's for Kids" devo (which I highly recommend!) after that. I love how often the verses or devo we read "just happen" to apply to the days situations -- I mean way more than just a coincidence! And the spiritual growth and awareness I am seeing develop in my youngest is usually enough to keep me from getting discouraged. It also helps a lot that her older sister is a beautiful example of what 10yrs of maturing will bring about. And I also am reminded daily how quickly this "season" of her life will pass...I will blink and she'll be in High School - Lord help me! Thank you again for your encouraging posts!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have twin girls that are almost three. I have really been trying to show my faith to them. During our morning drive to daycare, I will comment on the sunrise and thank Jesus for sunshine. Recently, one of the twins commented that the sunshine was coming and the other followed with a "thank you Jesus for sunshine" which really touched my heart. On our drive we also pray for each of our family members to have a good day. I am trying and I think they are getting some of it.

Joni Moore
jonidmoore@hotmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello,
Thank you for your story today. My prayer for this year is that I teach my 5 yr. daughter how to become closer to God and to understand all that is does for us. I struggle with this, I don't the bible as I should but I'm committed to making a difference this year.

Thank you for introducing me to Deuteronomy 6:5-7, I can't wait to share it with my husband tonight on the way to church. I'm going to type it up and hang it on our fridge as a daily reminder.

This comment has been removed by the author.

A subject close to my heart, friend. I've written a whole series of posts on my blog along these lines "Raising Faith". In particular, I recall a day when I got a call from my then senior son's teacher. He was caught cheating on an exam, giving an answer to another student. I met him at the school, took him to lunch, and we talked about what it means to embrace holiness in our lives; how the poor choices of my past deeply affected my life and his. I shared some "truth" with him he wouldn't have been able to handle years earlier. Painful for us both.

When Monday morning rolled around, my son asked the teacher if he could say a few words to the class (he attended a Christian school and was the class chaplain). He offered his apologies to them, asked for their forgiveness and told them he wanted to live pure before his God. I had no idea this occurred until talking to his teacher weeks later and he happened to mention it to me.

Indeed, my son stood tall in God's eyes in that moment because he was willing to bend to repentance and to the authority of his God. He's in college now. I couldn't be more proud of the leadership roll he's taken in the dorm and in other aspects on campus.

I thank God for that teachable moment...one of hundreds that have been chronicled in my heart and through my pen.

Becoming a "can-do" mom is most effectively facilitated by a heart that is willing to be taught by the doings of our kids. I firmly believe they end up being our teachers in the end if we are willing to bend.

peace~elaine
eolsen2@nc.rr.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You asked the question "What hinders you or helps you look for those teachable moments?" For me it is simply being too busy and setting unreal expectations for myself. We miss moments because we do not allow ourselves the time to teach. I would say the majority of moms wake up with some type of agenda or to do list. Many of us are married to this list. Guess who gets put on the back burner as we do this or that - the teachable moments. Our To Do Lists grower longer as we place more expectations upon ourselves to be this or to do that. In doing so I feel this hinders the time to just play with our kids and enjoy them. Many times they become a part of our to do list and we lose the very gift of parenting. We need to leave the house a mess for awhile and spend quality time with our kids and send our high expectations of being Martha Stewart or whoever else we are trying to be packing.

nazyouth4god (at) hotmail (dot) com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Renee

Busy busy busy...that is what hinders me from teaching my kids to be "can do" kids. My older is always asking me if she can help and I always say 'later' as I know it will be faster to do it myself.

Has been good to read these posts and D6. I need to realize God is giving me teachable moments and I need to take advantage of them. I pray I can slow down and take the time to do so.

I keep having this awful thought in my head that my kids are going to be "troubled teens" if I don't spend more quality time with them. I think this at the same moment I am ignoring them....I definitely need Gods help in this area!

Blessings

Kim
chinarnrmom@comcast.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My daughter sometimes gets scared at night. I came across a verse in the Psalms that says: "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for You alone, oh LORD make me dwell in safety." I had used that verse to remind myself that HE is with me at night when worries overcome me in the middle of the night. Every time I did, I was able to go peacefully back to sleep.
So, when my daughter told me she was scared, I quoted that verse to her and told her that I say that verse when I'm scared. She says "ok", and then lays her head back down to sleep. I know it is The Holy Spirit calming her spirit. I know it is The Holy Spirit that calms me down too and realize that GOD has everything under HIS control. My daughter, Savannah CAN DO IT!!! Thanks SO much for your devotions and ministry! GOD Bless!! Julie Spearing j-bug@att.net

Blogger Colleen said...

Hi Renee:

How timely your message is for me and my daughter. I have been struggling with ways I can reach her with God's word. I have to admit, I have been doing a very poor job of helping her to become close to God and accept Jesus as her Lord and savior. I am going to read your blog every day and look for all the hints, suggestions and ideas you have about this subject. I pray I can bring my daughter, who is 11, to the point she should be as a Christian. I have been so neglectful in this area and I am so happy the God has answered my prayer. This will be the start of helping my daughter understand the love and peace of knowing Jesus and teaching her how to be a "can-do kid."

Thanks and I look forward to reading and learning more.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok! I just posted a comment and HAVE to leave another one. I was talking about my daughter and I went onto my Facebook and was able to encourage a teenager I know who is singing tomorrow night at her school. She is nervous and I was able to tell her that I had total confidence in her and that she could do it! I quoted Philippians 4:13 and told her to remember that tomorrow evening. She said she would. And I probably wouldn't have quoted that if I hadn't JUST read this devotion. GOD is SO timely!! I read this at just the right time to be able to use it to encourage this teen. We serve an AWESOME GOD!!!!! Julie Spearing J-Bug@att.net

Blogger Shannon said...

Good afternoon...I think many things in children's lives can be teachable moments...Like when my children are out of the house, and have their own home, I will go to their house and leave my wrappers and glasses sitting in the living room, or stuff garbage down their couch...teachable moments for sure! In all seriousness, I have found that sharing with my daughter especially, things that I went through or learned while in my teen years sparks a little interest. I have a hard time letting them know that I screwed up, so I don't think they see me as someone who has messed up. I don't want them to say...Well you did that when you were younger...Something I am scared to admit. not sure why! Pride maybe??

enjoying these conversations!

Shannon
smarklow@gmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It seems whenever my day is not going the way I'd like it to be I click on today's message and behold it relates to how my day is going.It never fails the message points me to what I should do. Thanks for everything that you share!!!
mfran@rocketmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,

Thanks for the words of encouragement. It's my desire to raise a "can-do" child too!

seehisface07@yahoo.com

Blogger Leanna said...

oops... I, mom2po, forgot to include my email address on my post. Here it is just incase....
mom2po@verizon.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok this came to me after two very long weeks of Christmas break. My kids had lost the exhileration of the new toys and "stuff" and were quickly approaching an insane amount of tv time. I was finding my volume rising to new levels as well. One night my 7 year old gave my 2 1/2 year old and old devotion book for girls. my 2 1/2 year old ran around with it all night calling it her notebook. I had no idea what her notebook was as I was trying to complete my third load of laundry. Meanwhile my 6 year old son was what I call "fitting" in his room over having to put away his laundry. The girls began to bicker at out toothbrushing session and I was ready to blow!!! I turn to yes yell at my girls to knock it off when I saw the devotion book on the bathroom counter. I made all three come and sit down on the bathroom floor that moment and immediatly turned to complaining and whining devotion. My youngest was still on the potty which made her a captive audience:) I read the story of how a little girl didn't want to go to bed and then read the memory verse(Phillipians 2:14)to them. I then had them individually recite the verse to me! We talked about why God doesn't want us to complain and argue. We all gave an example including myself of when we have complained or argued. I had them recite the verse several more times since that day and it quells the bickering and complaining almost every time. Judy Johnson emmashadow24@hotmail.com

Blogger gunningfam05 said...

Renee,
Thankyou for sharing your heart concerning your boys and the things that occur.
It makes it easier to share what we go through as moms.. fellowship with other moms.

After yesterday I was trying to find those teachable moments.. one actually came today.
My 4 yr old daughter decided that she would rather hit/push her brother instead of obeying. So I asked her if what she did made Jesus sad when she didnt obey. Well she wanted to be sassy and said,, not gonna obey. Then a few minutes later I said that when she disobeyed mommy it made Jesus sad.
She seemed to get it the 2nd time around.
I think for me.. there are certain times that hinder me from teaching when I get really fustrated with them or in a stressful moment. At that point all I am thinking about is how stressed they are making me feel.
As I look .. I can see that the enemy is trying to distract from the important in those times.
Our kids love listening to praise music. So at the harried times.. I am trying to switch gears to PRAISING instead of stressing.
** There are times during the day when we hear the older 2 in the other room singing a praise song.. which is so neat.. God is stirring their hearts little by little.

Also my husband does his reading time in the morning. Sometimes our daughter will go up to my husband and want him to read to her. Its neat Father/daughter time in the word.

I look forward to reading tommorows blog:)

Chrissy Gunning
email: cgunning94504@adelphia.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had had enough today after a day of deadlines ,no breaks and stress. I came home to 2 kids complaining and not happy with the dinner or anything else.
After almost one hour of doing homework with my 8 yr. old daughter I ended up frustrated as she couldn't grasp the match or english report writing concepts.
I plopped down exhausted on the dining room table while they went down to watch t.v.alone. I just wanted to cry.
I ended up trying to answer some emails and was unusually curt with my answers. Then I read your story about your 4 yr. old.
You reminded me that my daughter is a Can-do kid and so is my 4 yr. old. And maybe just as importantly, I'm a Can-do mother through Jesus.
I'm no longer near to tears and am ready to join both of them , give them hugs and enjoy the little time left before some well-needed rest.
Thanks for your insight and thank-you Jesus for this intervention tonight.

Love,
A tired mom in Ottawa, Canada.

Blogger Tiffany-Eliana said...

Hello Renee,
Thank you so much for your article, it really encourage me!
I love the way God works. For some reason He thinks I am the right person to raise his dearest one.
My daughter is only 18 months, so even I know the journey is going to be long I will try to do my best to let her know (by mouth and by example) that she can be a can-do-kid, and there is no "handicap" that can stop that!
God bless you, your family and ministry!
Connie
conniew27@gmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was wonderful to read this today...I am a single mom, struggling with my 11 year old son who is fearful of everything new, and I am honestly at my wits end trying to encourage him. I was meant to read this encouragement - unfortunatly I cannot add any wisdom myself. But I can be thankful that there are others who understand my plight, and can help me on the path to helping my child!

Karen Molenda
molendakaren@comcast.net

Renee-we did someting different this Christmas. To make a long story short, there were no gifts under the tree. We didn't think the money would be there with my husbands loss of job. One week before Christmas, a "love offering" came our way. When we went shopping to buy the girls gifts they all seemed empty. We left the mall with only gift cards for their stockings instead. It wasn't the real meaning of Christmas. We gave each girl a journal and told them the best gift we could give them at Chrstmas was a relationship with christ however, no matter how much we wanted them to have that gift they had to choose it, to accept it. We gave them the journals and taught them a method to journal scripture and pray it back. We are hoping to instill a discipline we are passionate about in our own lives.

In His Graces~Pamela

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for reminding me of that powerful verse that yes, we CAN DO all things through our mighty awesome God!! How encouraging that is to a Mama like me as I homeschool 4 children. Countless other Mamas will be so blessed and be able to encourage their children, also!!
Blessings to you,
~Amy S.~

Blogger archiemothership said...

Good evening! I really liked your message. I am the mother of 3 kids, 2 now married and one hopefully finishing college this year. The daughter in college has had a troubled time these past three years. I struggle with how to stay positive while staying on her about getting things done well. She tends to procrastinate, fall behind, get sick, miss class, not get things done... I know God has a wonderful plan for her, but I'm looking for ways to encourage her in the midst of her not striving to make the most of each day. Any ideas?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I find it amazing that God would draw so many moms together with the same burden for planting those seeds of faith in our children. I had an opportunity to draw on the strength of God's word when my dear cousin died suddenly a few years ago.

As a stood there stunned and sobbing in our kitchen, my eyes caught the perpetual calendar with bible verses printed for each day. On this particularly difficult day, the verse was Isaiah 66:13 "As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you." As I read that, I sobbed with a peace like no other. I knew God was with my family in that moment.

When my then 3 year old daughter tried to comfort me, I was able to tell her my tears were joyful and that God reminded me He was close by and that everything would be ok. Though she asked alot of questions, she reminded me for a long time after that God was always nearby ready to help us like daddy. This particular daughter is one who shys away from new things. I've read quite a few ideas I can try with her in those moments she needs more encouragement!

So many times I feel I fall short in passing on my faith to my daughters. And then God lays something on my heart to remind me to stay the course and keep trying. Thank you for initiating this conversation!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,

I have two boys ages 4 and 5 who I pray for daily. I think at these ages the most important concept I can instill in them is how much God loves them. We pray daily and I tell them that God hears our prayers. I realized how my boys were beginnng to understand this when one day my oldest son skinned his knee and began crying hysterically while saying, "Momma, Momma I want you to pray for me. I want you to pray for me." We did and he calmed down. Ever since then, it is one of the first things we do if anyone gets hurt or experiences pain. What's even more wondrous is how God hears and answers those prayers. It makes me wonder whose faith is stronger, mine or theirs? Thanks for asking. jdav7@aol.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,

Thanks for the encouraging and challenging blog. Here's our D6 story:

At the end of October, our six year old son was complaining because we were not going out to eat at a restaurant after church. I launched into my best mom lecture: "There are hungry children all over the world..."

Well, that seemed to quiet him and I didn't hear anything about it for the next several minutes. However, when I glanced in my rearview mirror, I saw tears spilling down his cheeks. "Mommy, I didn't know there are kids who don't have any food."

Distracted with driving, music in the background, two other children in the van, and my plans for the rest of the day, I thought perhaps I'd gone overboard with the lecture, so I told him we'd give to a ministry that helps feed hungry children.

I nearly missed an incredible opportunity, but thank God, he wasn't satisfied with my half-hearted offer! He said, "Mom, I want to do something to help them, but I'm just a kid." Finally, the light switched on in my heart--this was a God moment! So we talked about young David defeating the giant Goliath, how he trusted in God to fight with him. I reminded him of Samuel hearing the voice of the Lord as a young boy, and of Josiah who became king of Judah when he was only eight years old and restored true worship in the temple.

Well, my son listened carefully, then replied. "God's telling me to help those kids. He loves me and is going to help me."

When we got home, he gave me most of the money that he had been saving for a video game. He told me that God wanted him to raise $1,000! Amazed by his faith, I was now the one learning a lesson!

In the end, he exceeded his goal in about two months (without money from mom or dad), and wants to go on a missions trip with my husband as soon as he can.

Renee, my kids teach so much about God. There seems to be a new lesson every day, and it's a good thing because I've got a lot to learn!

Thanks for your openness in sharing your journey, and for inspiring me to be the parent that God has called me to be and that my kids need me to become.

Blessings,
Susanna

susannacaudill@verizon.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shalom Renee!
Thank you! Thank you for being obedient to God!
I'm the mother of one child, Bethany, who is 9. This is our first year of homeschooling and we have our good days and our bad. The other day was one of those days where I had a hundred different things on my mind, or so it seemed, Bethany was working on her math sheet. Math...just thinking about it makes me want to cringe. I loved Math in school, teaching it to my daughter this year, not so much.
Last year, while in 2nd grade, at a private Christian school, Bethany could finish a 100 math fact sheet, multiplication, in under 4 minutes. This year..."What's 2x3?" "Uh... 4..?" Oh, Father help me! That is what I have to say over and over again sometimes. I lose patience with her too quickly sometime, to my great shame. Which, I know is a very big part of the problem.
But the other day, she was working on another 100 fact sheet and I happened to hear her sigh for about the 5th time in frustration. When I looked up, "What's wrong," coming from my mother, my heart dropped and sorrow and frustration lodged in my throat.
I could see the spirit of failure, of self-condemnation all over her. God literally 'showed' me how it crawls on her, if you will. I wanted to vent my frustration and at the same time wrap her in my arms. I did neither, really. But I did look her in the eyes and tell her that, in Jesus name, we needed to pray that God would reveal to her how smart and beautiful she is. Her big brown eyes welled and spilled over with tears as she shook her head.
God help me. I knew parenting would be hard, but raising a child and especially raising a child to understand WHO they are and WHOSE they are...whew! That's hard. I struggle daily, espcially since I am human, I am flesh and I have my own insecurities and short-comings that I feel are being handed down to her.
Since she was in the womb, I prayed over her, with her and it's something that I've done with her, pretty much every day, all her life. I've prayed for her and with her that she'd be a Mighty Daughter of Zion, full of faith, love and power...
But I am failing her somewhere. I have given her Psalm 139:13-16 to claim, 2 Timothy 1:7...
I guess though, if I'm not totally, unashamedly, and fervantly SHOWING her, how will she know.
And now that I've babbled, I will say that I am glad I clicked on the link for this blog. I'm glad that God knows what we need when we need it... and I know this is something that I need, as do many other mothers.
I AM taking to the bank that I'm a 'Can Do' mom. I'm going to start claiming that. And I'm going to have her start claiming that she's a 'Can Do' kid.
Thank you, Renee. I look forward to many more encouragements and enlightenments! Praise God, He is so good!

Shalom,
Danielle
endeavor2@bellsouth.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Renee,
I so need help in finding the right things to say to my 17 year old son. He has been so shy and reserved until the last two years. Some of his friends are not who I would choose for him. I think they are bad influences.
He does go to church without being told to, which is a plus. But I see a lot of anger in him. He has an absent father that came in his life for the first time 2 years ago. He spent a week with him, bought him a keychain and promised him he would bring him the car that goes with it at Christmas. That was over a year ago, and he hasn't heard from him since.
It devastated him to say the least. I blame myself because I found his father and brought him in his life only for him to treat him like he did.
I just wish I knew what to say to him. He is like me in the sense that he carries his heart on his shoulders. When he gets upset he goes outside or in another room and he cries.
I also have a 3 year old daughter who is totally opposite. She is fearless and could be a door greeter at Walmart, LOL.
I know it hurts him to see his little sister with me and her father. I know he feels cheated deep inside. The only father figure he has ever had was my father and he is 60 and his health is failing. It would totally destroy him if something happen to his grandfather. He would feel so lost. I know at his age it's too late for him to look to my daughters father as a father figure.
It's just a mess and I could really use some guidance.
God Bless,
Cheryl
www.fuzzywuzzy735@yahoo.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bless your heart Renee for this powerful post.
I have a 3yr old daughter whom I noticed that in the last few weeks she has been particular about announcing it when its dark. On Tuesday, I was getting set to go to work and she said, “mummy, don’t go because it is still dark outside”. The lord lead me to share with her Ps 84:11 that said the lord God is our light and our protector, I took her outside to show her that despite the dark we can still see. Ever since, she still announces it whenever it’s dark but confirms that we can still see.
Also she also believes that she can do all thing because God had helped me to share this truth with her before now.
Once again thank you for the tips in Judges 6 that you’ve highlighted

Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow ~ what an encouragement to me!
I am actually thinking how this applies to my husband and co-workers as well as to my daughters! Thanks for sharing.

ardith@tranquility.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you Renee for that very timely message. I'm a school teacher with a student who absolutely CAN DO long division, but is so afraid to try(and possibly be wrong)that she is paralyzed and actually won't even attempt the problem. I'm going to use your thoughts today to help encourage her (and ease my own frustrations). Thank you also for the scripture references; I'm going to post them in my classroom, and one on her desk!
Sharon
sharoncivile6@ gmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oops! Forgot to leave my email: daniellebetters@hotmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My 12 year old son just started a new middle school this week and it threatened to get the best of both of us. He did not want to leave the friends he had at his old school and I hated to see him so anxious about going to a new place. My husband and I encouraged him with the scripture "For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." That actually encouraged me as well because as a parent I sometimes allow the uncertainty of life to weigh heavier on me than it should, and then I remember the One who is on my side and things quickly come back into focus. Thank you for your daily devotions, they really do encourage me and help me in my daily Christian walk.

Monica W.
qacleaning2003@yahoo.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I find myself craving information, tips and statagies on how to improve the lives of myself and my children..I have 3 sons - 21, 20 and 6! I am going "through" a divorce and trying to be the better person and mother God has intended me to be...it is up to me to fullfill the role he has set before me. I so enjoy reading about your days and life - you give me hope and make me smile!
Annette Pirkle
UNCC
704-687-5859 (w)
704-454-3268 (h)
apirkle@uncc.edu
apirkle@carolina.rr.com
Thanks!!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Renee, I had a D6 moment while walking with my 4 yr old grandson (we are raising) on land that my husband and I may be purchasing to relocate. We were holding hands and just admiring the beauty when he asked, "Mawmaw, are we going to buy it today?" I answered him, "Oh, honey, Mawmaw and Pawpaw have to go home and pray on it."
Well, that opened up a long and wonderful conversation of seeking God's will in ALL things we do. From big decisions like the one we are facing to everyday ones, 'do I share this new and special toy with my cousin when he comes over?' He was really into the conversation and asked very good questions.
Such as 'how will I know what God is saying if I can't hear Him with my ears?' But he totally got it when I answered that sometimes you must listen with your heart. His eyes lit up and he said, yeah Mawmaw like when I get a bad feeling in my belly and not a good one about something.
Yes,sweet little man, just like that.
Thankyou Renee for all that you do. May God continue to work through you.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the practical application steps...sometimes we read and it sounds nice and makes sense, but it's still hard to figure out how to apply the principal.
Renee B.
rrbray@mmm.com

Blogger Leighann said...

God is so good! We are struggling with this very issue right now with our 7 year old son. He is so afraid of failure that he won't play sports with his friends. He doesn't think he's good at sports. When he plays with his friends, he will act silly and just run away.

Recently, we were playing football together as a family and with one of his friends. He did so well that day. It's amazing what spending quality time with your kids can do. It encourages them beyond what we can even imagine.

I've sent your devotional to my husband so we can read this and share together. Thanks for sharing from your heart, Renee!

Blogger Leighann said...

It's me again! I forgot to list my email for the drawing: mlboyer_2000@yahoo.com

Thanks!

Blogger MJ said...

I forgot to leave my email as well. mjanders@wowway.com Thanks!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What great resources and encouragement! Please enter me in your drawing.

thanks,

Shelley
skransberger@yahoo.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am the 'anonymous' raising my 4 yr old grandson. I didn't even know how to leave my email..wasn't asked for it when I left my comment. So, I am going to try again.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee,
Thank you so much for reminding us that it's ok, it's actually crucial, that we keep focused on our children. Some days I feel overwhelmed by the state of the country and the world and where should my "mission field" be and what do I do? Then God reminds me that my mission field is at home. I don't have to go out and look for causes because I have been blessed with three of them who need me and need someone to show them the lord. And He has already given me a Kingdom Cause. Thanks for reminding me! blw104@hotmail.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi - I left a comment at 10:31 yesterday (under the name "Teri Schultz," but forgot to leave my email address. It is:
teresa.schultz@alconlabs.com

Thanks!

Blogger Wendi said...

My 4 year old and I talk a lot about God and Bible stories but I can't think of any time in particular that we applied such ideas to an every day instance. That is one thing I really want to work on is incorporating Scripture and Spirituality more in everything we do and say.

Last year my then 12 year old son was not putting forth his best effort. The biggest problem was that he was still making strait A's. But he would only do what was expected not what he was capable of. So we talked about how he was not using the talents that God gave him. We read the Scripture about the three servants whom the master entrusted 10, 5 and 1 talent too. The first two doubled their talents and the last hid it and gave him back what he was given. That is what my son was doing; not putting forth his best effort and multiplying his talents for God.

I know I could be doing so much better myself. I shared yesterday's blog with my husband. He also read my post (which I didn't think that he would do.) It lead to a good discussion between us. I hope that we will discuss things more and be able to incorporate more D6 into our family's life.

Wendi O
wendio@suddenlink.net

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for this devotion. I have two daughters, 19 and 16 years old. I am saddened to admit that my 16 year old is still struggling with I Can'ts. She is shy and afraid to even order her own food at a restaurant. After reading this, I feel that I failed in parenting her to become a can-do child. I would love any suggestions on how I can change this in her.

Blogger Kim said...

Thank you for this wonderful insight.

Kim
kimwhite62@gmail.com

Blogger Unknown said...

Hi Renee,

I loved your devotion "You're a "can do" kid. Then I noticed you had a message on Mining for gold in your children. On my blog I wrote an article titled "Panning for Gold". You can read it here: http://wherethegrassisgreener-renee.blogspot.com/search/label/parenting

I really enjoy your devotions and all those on P31.

In Him,
Renee Peebles
NC mom of four

Blogger shalom09 said...

Didi Gray
didianderica@yahoo.com

Bless you Renee.

Today was a hard I can't day and we really had to keep working through her not overcoming in homework missed because she was sick yesterday and had a lot of make up work, as the hours passed so did her grace and I felt like today her can't might have won !but after a 30 min brake and some hugging and talking she regrouped and we went on the math still was a struggle but she won that battle amen!!

Thank you again for allowing us into your life and struggles that are ours as well

Didi Gray

Blogger Jennifer said...

My 1st born perfectionist child is like this and your reminder to lead them through something they CAN do and then allow them to do it on their own is great. Thx.

Jennifer

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for your encouragement. You have a gift and are using it for God's purposes! I am blessed by your words again and again!
bczook@yahoo.com

Anonymous Anonymous said...

God bless you all. I came to website by what others might call an accident, but I call a miracle.
Thanks for all you do. My email is
lil.lupe@att.net

Thanks again.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

At Bible study just last night, I asked my pastor's wife for advice on helping my child who has a fear of failure. My daughter is naturally talented in so many ways, but she is hard on herself and becomes resistant and "mopey" when something challenges her. Rather than say, I almost got it; she will put herself down.
I have called her a superstar second grader lately. She is my oldest so she likes this and is beginning to feel that her homework and chores are more important than boring and unfair. I have taught her scripture, but I had not read this part of your devotions until today.
I just heard Lysa Terkuerst last Friday and Saturday and have had amazing opportunities this week to say yes to God and minster to a lady with cancer who lives alone. God began to reveal to me her needs and how to care for her and minister to her because he knew that I was ready to say, "Yes, Lord, yes, Lord, yes, Lord, yes!"
I hope he will now also begin to help my daughter and I to become a Can Do Mom-daughter team. We look so much alike and I sometimes need God to motivate her from within and let me back off on the pushing. Scriptures such as ABC Bible Verses by Susan Hunt have helped me a lot over the years.
It is an answer to prayer to find your message and just the right time in our life. Thank you and God Bless!
Susan susansumner@bellsouth.net

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