Building Our Husbands Up Through Prayer
Welcome to those of you visiting from the Proverbs 31 Devotion today.

As I shared in my devotion, I haven't always been so good at following and trusting my husband's lead. But over the past 15 years, God has done a work in me and in JJ. I know marriage can be hard and trusting someone to lead when there are things you struggle with together is really, really hard. But I also know God uses us in powerful ways to love our husbands like He does - unconditionally.

One of the best ways we can love our husbands is to pray for them. Praying for JJ
has truly helped me follow his lead. This way I know He's covered spiritually as I invite God to do an amazing work in JJ's life. Of course, JJ has to respond to God's work in his heart, but my part is not based on JJ's response to God. It's based on my surrendering and seeking God's heart for my husband.

JJ tells me prayer is the best gift I can give him.
Here are some verses I pray for my husband that maybe you can gift to your husband, too!

"Father, continually renew my husband's mind, resulting in a transformed life. Help him bring every thought into captivity to make it obedient to Christ. Give him a greater understanding of Your Word. Help him to think on things that are pure and right and worthy of praise." (Psalm 119:15, Romans. 12:2, 2 Cor.10:5)

"Lord, keep opening my husband's eyes to deep spiritual truths. Help him to see things as You see them. Please guard his eyes from looking at worthless things. " (Psalm 119:18, Psalm 119:37)

"Father, let my husband hear Your voice clearly. Help him to recognize your voice with certainty. Protect him from listening to anyone who is not seeking and walking with You. Help him not to be affected negatively by what others say and to discern between good and evil. Give him the ability to determine what is of You and what is not." (Isaiah. 30:21, 1 Kings 3:9, 1 John 4:1)

"Help my husband to speak the truth in love. Help him to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Give him the couraage to lovingly confront when necessary. Let the words he speaks be Yours, not his own. Help him speak words that bring grace and truth to the hearers. I also pray that you will help him to grow in his ability and desire to communicate with you and others." (Psalm 19:14, 119:13, 41:3; Ephesians 4:15, 4:29; James 1:19)

"Give my husband a heart that seeks pasisonately after You. Teach him to guard his heart with diligence. Help him deal with anything in his heart that is not pleasing to You. Create in him a pure heart. Enable him to lead our family with integrity." (Psalm 78:72, 119:10-11; Proverbs. 4:23; 1 Thessalonians. 3:13)

"Lord, I pray that everything my husband does would be done with his whole heart, serving You rather than man. I pray that You will also help him to increase his skills and his abilities. Bless everything he puts his hands to." (Psalm 24:3-4, Colossians 3:23)

I pray that my husband would love Your Words and walk in Your ways. I pray that He would be to walk in a manner that is worthy of You, bearing fruit in every good work, and that He would pass Your truths to our children as he walks along life's path. Father, when he walk through the valley of the shadow of doubt and difficulties, I pray that he would fear no evil because He knows that you are with him. (Deuternonomy 6:7, 8:6, Collosians 1:10, Psalm 23:4)

I have seen prayer transform my marriage and my life. Just this week I watched the power of prayer as our family takes some big steps of faith, following my husband's lead into the wonderful world of adoption. Adoption is our family's calling but what many people don't know is that my husband is the one who initiated our "following" God to Africa to get a little girl. JJ is leading us each step of the way.
(To read more scroll down to Monday and Wednesday's posts. You can also click here to read how our adoption story started in October 2007.)

Whatever steps of faith God is calling you to take personally or with your husband, I want you to know that I am praying for you and your marriage today. We have an enemy set on destroying marriages and one of his tools is to pit husbands and wives against each other. I have experienced his efforts firsthand. What our husbands need most is our respect; what our marriages need most is prayer.

Let's look for ways to build our husbands up with our words and with prayer, covering them from head to toe!

Sweet blessings,


Blogger Michelle Sherlin said...

Renee- LOVED your Proverbs 31 devo this am! You wouldn't believe I did the very same thing in my wedding vows!!! My husband and I are in marriage counseling right now learning the very same thing you wrote! Praise God for redundancy and confirmation!~Michelle

Blogger Runner Mom said...

Hey, Renee! The devo was wonderful this morning! Thank you so much for sharing! Praying for our hubbies from head to toe is a great idea! HOpe y'all are enjoying yourselves this week. Stay cool!


Blogger Carol said...

Thank you for sharing this with us today!

Blogger Becky said...

Hi Renee,

Today is my 10th wedding anniversary and I woke up think about how much I love my husband. This blog post was perfect timing. : )

He has too work an odd shift and isn't able to make it to church any more. I worry about his spiritual health and have been praying for him. Thank you so much for this fresh way to pray for him. I love it and am grateful!

Praying for you, too!

Blogger Becky said...

(blush) should have proof read that last comment before pushing publish. : )

Anonymous Debbie said...

So very true. I didn't think my marriage was going to last after the first 7 years, I also went to God and asked Him to change my husband and instead, He taught me to be the helpmate He intended for me to be. I am now in a happy and blessed marriage of 31 years.
People in our families do not understand my submissiveness; they see it as a weakness, but they can not deny the peace and strength they see and the man of God my husband has become.
Continue sharing. God's ways are not man's ways -- Thank God, His ways are so much better.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, I haven't read a P31 devotion for awhile. :(. God really had one for me today. Thank you for listening to Him and sharing with us!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for today's devo. It was so appropriate for me for today. It's so cool how God knows just what we need to hear at just the right time. THANK YOU !!

Blogger Linda said...

Renee, your devotion this morning was very apt. How often I forget that the one thing a man needs is respect from his wife. And thanks for sharing ways we can pray for our husbands. :)

Blogger Meeka said...

I am continually amazed at how the Lord confirms to me that He IS listening & feeds me with what I need RIGHT when I need it!
Thank you for today's devotional. Please pray for my marriage. I am desperately trying to be quiet & still & wait on Him to transform our marriage into what He wants it to be.
Blessings to you!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for your word this morning I ask that you please keep me in your prayers as I learn to be submissive to my husband. Just to give you a little history. Me and my husband were married almost 16 years ago. We divorced he was doing the worldly thing and we coming back together each time a child came a long now 14, 8, and 3. However last year God blessed us to put our family back together for good and my husband is a God fearing God loving man. Our biggest struggles come from me. He spoils me rotten and he loves me dearly but I guess I have that fear of how my father did my mom so I am resistant in a lot of areas. I guess I just won’t let him be the man in our marriage that God has called him to be. It all seems to be getting worse and worse and each time God helps him to get passed it and he forgives me and says it never happens. But I’m like Lord I’m so jacked up and I do this man this way and yet he loves me anyways. And this last episode (just 3 days ago) I thought was going to be the end of my marriage. But God put it in his heart and he forgave me. So please keep me in your prayers.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for the reminders I need to keep praying for my husband head to toe!!!

Blogger Diona said...

Renee -
Thank you so much for the reminder! And for writing this for other women who are struggling to allow their husbands to take the role that the Lord meant for them! You and Melanie are blessings!

Blessings to you and yours!!!!

Blogger Deb said...

I share some of those same hangups about submission.

We'll be celebrating our thirty-first anniversary in August, and you would think that by now the submitting thing should go smoothly at our house.

Not so.

I don't know why I balk sometimes about being under my husband's authority; but I do.

He deserves better.

I've learned so much about God's love from the way that my husband loves our children and me.

He really is the man of my dreams.

Thanks for sharing some practical ways to pray for our husbands.

Anonymous pbrcox said...

Boy did I need to read this today (and a long time ago)! I used to be a little submissive and then I had a baby. After that, my hormones and attitude changed. I became more defensive and well quite b****y towards my husband. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and those bible verses. I hope to put into practice what you preach.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have been praying all week for an answer to my husband and I's problems. This blog is the exact answer I needed. God knows what he's doing, thank you both! Laurie

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for such a wonderful devotional today. I need to be reminded of that daily. Like others, I have not been submissive or respectful to my husband. We are now separated and in "limbo" with him not knowing what to do. I think he wants to run, but he still has some feelings for me. I pray I get the opportunity to show him daily the respect he needs from me and the opportunity to continue to be his wife. I pray he can forgive me and fall in love with me again.

We are one month away from our 25th wedding anniversary. We married very young and I didn't know the "meaning" of the vows or what it meant to be submissive to him. God has shown me and continues to show me daily. I trust in the Lord, my marriage can be reconciled.

Renee, thank you again for your encouragement today.


Blogger Brandee said...

Renee, thank you for a great devotion! Your devo hits directly to one of the things that I am very passionate about. Just this month on my own "Opening the Door" blog we have been praying for our marriages and different issues that they face. My husband is not a Christian and so sometimes it can be hard to follow his lead when I don't really agree. I keep trusting God in His perfect timing and seek Him to be the wife I need to be while I wait.

God Bless,

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello Renee,

I really appreciate your devotional. I've been married for two years and within that time we've moved here from the Caribbean for ministry reasons. The transition has been tough.

I'm just getting the hang of this praying for your husband thing! What an experience! I've been praying for patience to wait on God too :-) MEGA B

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i always wanted my husband to take the lead, honestly i did, but i contradicted myself many times in the way i criticized him and his choices... through {much} prayer, God did show me that I needed to give him love and respect even when i didn't agree with his decisions...after 6 years, we finally began to get it right. Things were going very well as we headed toward our tenth anniversary, but his life here ended before we got to that milestone - i had planned a special day, and I am sure he had, too. now I don't wait for special occasions any more, some days my daughter and i just have a special dinner or i take her out to a movie just because. your devo was right on the mark today, perhaps, i will be more prepared to submit willingly if i remarry in the future. Thank you!

Thank you for your precious gentle reminder Renee!

God Bless You!

Blogger Alyce said...

Loved it Renee. Everytime I read something from you, I feel like I'm looking in the mirror...I can so relate!

Blogger Angie said...

All I can say is..Thank you!

Blogger momishome2 said...

Ouch! What good reminders, Renee. Thanks for being so transparent and sharing your heart. I really struggle with this issue and this was just the punch in the arm I needed. ~ Bethany L.

Blogger Mel said...


I'm so greatful for your heart to follow the Lord in your prayer ministry for him. My husband is trying to become a professional pga tour golfer and my ministry currently is to pray, work to provide for our family and to constantly uplift him and point him to the Lord's victory as he competes.
I'm the strong personality, typically a natural born leader, so this has been hard for me, but is what God called us to.

I'm so glad to know you're all out there doing the same; uplifting your husbands in prayer!

Blogger Shonda said...

Thanks for your devo on husbands. It was very timely and the Lord used it to answer a question I asked HIM. I felt the Lord leading me to "be quiet" with my husband & I didnt understand. He used your devo and blog to answer. Thanks a bunch.
Blessings in Christ--

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Renee
Thanks for your inspiring message.Indeed its an answer to my prayer for my 3 years old marriage.I have been blessed by your testimony and may God bless you for your ministry which am sure will touch so many women out there struggling in their marriages.
I am was also touched by your adoption outreach ministry in Africa where I am originally from.I intend to start blogging too so as to share my testimony and encourage other women as my personal calling in ministry while God transforms my marriage too coz I believe if God did it for you He can do it for me too.I would love to meet you.God bless you.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you! I identify with the anonymous comment about how family doesn't understand my submissiveness to my husband. We had a rocky marriage for several years, but now have really found each other. We will celebrate 19 years in July. Thank you Lord!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Renee, I just have to thank you for your article and the prayers - it has come at a challenging time in my marriage!! I thank God for directing me to your blog site and "speaking" to me through your blog. May God continue to bless you as you bless others!! Justine

Anonymous PL said...

Renee, Thank you for this wonderful devotion. I have only been married for 8 years and continue to daily struggle with letting my husband lead. This devotion helped me realize that I need to really step back, look at how I am treating my hubby and start honoring God's word on how I SHOULD be treating him! Thank you again (and I am sure my husband would thank you too!)
Paula :)

I have never before realized that it's not my problem whether my husband is obedient to God, I am only responsible for my own surrender to my husband. Wow, thanks for pointing that out! It's hard enough to surrender, let alone try to control my husband's response to God! This could change our marriage!

Blogger Suni said...

Thank you very much Ms. Renee for the wonderful and encouraging message. Really touch my heart. It will help me to love my husband more as per God's will. I will apply ur suggestions in my practical life. Please pray for me to be successful in that so that I can live a victorious life and serve Lord as a family. Let my children see our life a living model for them. Thank you so much. MAY GOD HELP AND ENCOURAGE YOU TO BE A POWERFUL WARRIOR FOR GOD'S MINISTRY SO THAT MANY CAN ENCOURAGE BY YOU.

Hi Renee!

I just read your devo this morning. I wish I could say that it totally didn't apply to me. :)

I, too, have been married for nearly 16 years. And we have been through a lot. I've swung from one end to the other on the pendulum of "pray, encourage, support, submit--criticize, withdraw, take over, disrespect"

In your devo, I saw that I'm on the wrong end of the spectrum right now. I hate to even admit or write that, but it's true.

So there it is in writing, on the internet for all to see. I suppose it's time for me to do something about it, eh?

Love you and your ministry. Blessings to you today, friend.


Blogger My Journey to Hope said...

Renee, I'm passing along the "One Lovely Blog Award" to you for your incredibly inspiring blog! your words have ministered to me many, many times.

To accept the award, post it on your blog, along with the name of the person who has granted the award, and the blog link. Then, pass the award to 15 other blogs that you’ve discovered. Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award.

Hopefully this will introduce people to some fabulous blogs that are out there!

:) Michelle

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow... It was great to get this devotional this week. I am at odds with it because of my situation at home. I actually wrote to look at "my husband as the head of our house hold as I look to God as the head of the church" This has been a really hard promise to keep with all that we have experienced in the past five years. Believe it or not... but he actually made a copy of my vows and place it on my side of the bed to remind me what i had promised and what I am trully lacking of doing. I trlly feel convicted by this devotional... for I know how much truth it trully has. Please keep me in your prayers that I will do what is right instead of doing what my flesh wants me to do.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

thank you so much for your beautiful prayers. I asked God to show me what is wrong with my marriage. God is so good! He has brought several issues to the surface. One being my own behavior. I need to be a prayerful wife, agreeing with God and praying for my husband.
Your words are perfect! Praise God for the timing of your message, and for your generous sharing spirit.
Blessings to you as you go forth on your journey of adopting lil' Aster!

a sister in Christ

Blogger DOakley said...

Thank you, Renee, for the reminder of how important prayer is in a marriage--and how crucial it is that we pray for our husbands. It's not easy to make decisions that affect the well being of other people and carrying the responsibility of looking after a family.

We mothers know that responsibility but often forget that our husbands feel that responsibility too in other ways.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee, your devotion was straight to me from God. I've been trying to pray my marriage through some difficult times and it just keeps going down hill. Please pray for me as I try to let my husband lead - but also pray that he will step it up and lead our family as a Godly man...something he has not been doing for some time now, if ever.

I was very blessed by this post! I shared it with all my Christian friends!! God can do amazing things through prayer!! Thank you!!! Allyson

Anonymous Martha said...

A-M-A-Z-I-N-G The devotion about respecting our husbands came at exactly the right time in my life - go figure! Thank you, Renee, for helping God get through to my stubborn heart. Thank you, thank you, thank you....


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I loved your devo today! I love to pray scriptures over my husband too. I have alomost beeen married a year and I know how important it is to pray for my marriage daily and ask God to bring us closer together so the devil will not have a foothold. I was wondering if you had a prayer you pray over your marriage like the one you pray over your husband? If you do will you please send it to me?

Thanks for being such a blessing!

Kristy Oliver

Anonymous Anonymous said...


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Renee, I know this is coming 3 months late, but i just read the devotional and blog for 6-19-09 today 9-25-09. this has been a blessing to me since I have been searching for ways and ideas on how to respect my husband. This is not an easy task. But your words of encouragement definitely helped. Thank you for all you do. YOu are a blessing to others. Keep up the good work. Marci

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